Road trippin’

Josh and I went on a road trip this weekend to see my beautiful cousin get married! And I used to really look forward to road trips with Josh because we would rock out to some music! I would burn cd’s…yeah back before ipods were everywhere…and we would sing along together and it was awesome.

But as time has gone on, my tastes in music have evolved. Now our road trips look more like this:

I’m the happy one in case you were wondering…Now days, the only music we can both agree on is Blue October and Texas country.

I just love all kinds of music. I know I’ve mentioned it before but I have everything from Enya to Eminem to Hank Williams in my ipod and I listen to it all. Just depends on my mood which is heavily affected by music. And it is a major aspect of my running. But it takes a lot of time and effort to keep refreshing the playlists and planning according to what I am doing (intervals, flat/easy, hills).

And lately, I haven’t had the time…err…more like I haven’t had the energy to deal with it. And really, there are just only so many pop songs I can download before they kinda start to sound the same. Which is a problem for me. I look for music that at least sounds kind of artistic or has lyrics that I can get pumped up to.

So I thought it might be time to try something new. I had read on other blogs of people who run to classical or instrumental songs. I figured it was worth a try. So I picked out a few songs that I thought would work for me (like 2 Steps From Hell) and tried it out on a short 3 mile run.

I was expecting this huge epiphany. I was already planning a blog in which I described a spiritual experience of reigniting my love for running and everything just clicked again.

But that’s not actually how it went…

I mean, I didn’t hate it…but I didn’t love it either. I’m thinking it might be something I have to try a few more times and play with the type of songs. I haven’t given up but I’m not sold either.

Then we went to see the movie The Heat that night and I was loving the soundtrack! So I went home and got a bunch of new music. My next run was awesome!

And there it was…The runner’s high. It had been a few months since I’d had one and I was honestly starting to believe that the luster was just gone for me.

But that’s how it works. Just when you think you’re over it, you have an amazing run and you realize that yup…you’re still addicted.

You can see all my running/workout songs on my playlist page but a few of my faves  right now are below (warning! some of these songs are explicit)

212, Azealiza Banks
Spaceman, Hardwell
Blkkk Skkkn Head, Kanye West
Big Spender, Theophilus London

“Nothing is more singular about this generation than its addiction to music.”-Allan Bloom

Honeymoon’s over

I just love Chris Powell! He seems like such a sweet caring man and I believe that’s why he is so successful with his clients. I love watching him on Extreme Weight Loss and I’ve been super excited that there’s finally been new episodes in my Tivo every week.

This show is such a motivation to so many people that you can do anything you set your mind to. The body achieves what the mind believes right? That’s always been my motto.

Until it wasn’t.

When I was first started trying to get healthy,  it was so hard to say no. That’s why it took me 3 years to lose all the weight. But once I figured out how much better I felt when I made healthy  choices it got easier. Then when I looked at before/after pictures, it was really easy to say no to all my trigger foods. Once I hit my goal, I was terrified to gain anything back. I knew exactly how many minutes of cardio it would take to burn off that extra slice of pizza or giant frozen margarita and my answer was (usually) no thank you!

But I have maintained my weight loss for a year now. And here’s how it happens. You skip a workout here, enjoy a night out there…and nothing bad happens. Your nightmares about gaining 20 pounds or losing your stamina in your workouts don’t come true. So the next week you let stuff slide a bit more and so on and so forth.

Lately, all I want is this

and candy. I don’t even like sweets that much! I mean, these cravings are bad…like went to the doctor to have a pregnancy test because I thought something was definitely up. (It was negative by the way)

I’m sure all the stress and feelings of inadequacy (when I was out of work) are the cause of this major set back in my food addiction process. I mean, almost a year ago I was talking about how I was craving a run, not food when a stressful day hit. But somewhere in the midst of quitting my job, moving to my parents’, moving to St. Louis, moving back to my parents’, then moving back home, being out of work, starting a new job, I just got tired. I got tired of making decisions about what to eat and what workouts to do.

Poor Josh, he has been struggling with me because I have been such a bad influence on him. He is so much stronger than me though.

The truth is, in this society, maintaining a healthy body and mind is hard work. And not unlike marriage, there is a honeymoon phase. At first, it’s exciting because your body is new and you’re still getting compliments and buying new clothes. I see it in every weight loss show I watch. People who have lost a lot of weight are unstoppable! But then the compliments go away, the workouts get boring, you get tired of shopping, and the “new” body is just the same body you’ve had for a year now.

Then what do you do? I don’t know for sure.

But here’s what I do know. When I think back to my life 3 years ago and I read diary entries from that time period, I do not like what I see. I was incredibly unhappy and out of control of my life. And changing my lifestyle changed me….physically, mentally, and emotionally. And yes, it sucks to say no to velveeta and dessert. But it sucks a whole lot more to be depressed and unhappy all the time.

So I will keep doing what I know I need to do. I will keep waking up every day with the best intentions. Sometimes I’ll make good choices, and sometimes I won’t. But I just thank God every single day that I get to wake up to an incredible man who loves me no matter what and that we have an amazing supportive family. Because that’s way more important than whether I had that extra slice of pizza or ran than extra mile.

“I don’t want my life to be defined by what is etched on a tombstone. I want it to be defined in what is etched in the lives and hearts of those I’ve touched.” -Steve Maraboli

Workin’ 9 to 5

I made it through the first week of my new job! This was so much better than any other first week I’ve had this year! I am much more in my element in this position. I get to use my organizational skills and my creativity. It’s super laid back and quiet. But it’s only the first week and it’s the slow season so I have a feeling some of that will change. But regardless, I already feel at home.

When I was subbing and waiting tables, I got sick to my stomach on my way to work every single shift. Especially waiting tables…there are so many ways to screw up in that job. I was terrified of dropping a tray, slipping on a lemon in the kitchen, losing cash, mixing up a ticket, ordering the wrong food, delivering the wrong food, pissing off the cooks or the dishwashers, forgetting to bring the ranch/tabasco/A-1 sauce/lemons/bread/whatever the heck they asked for. It was scary!

But this job is very similar to what I was doing at the university. It’s weird because even though I am 15 minutes across town from the school in an entirely different building doing a completely unrelated job, I still find myself reaching for things where they used to be in my old office. Or glancing at the phone every time it rings because I used to have caller ID on my other office phone. I left that job last December but it’s like I was never “not-working”.  I’m not sure how I feel about that…

But want to know the absolute BEST part about my week? I arrived at 9 and left at 5 every single day. Say whaaa?!?!

Yep. That’s right people. I don’t even know what to do with myself now that the days of 40+ hours a week are gone.

yup…pretty much sums up my old life

I am perfectly happy with 35 hours a week. It gives me plenty of time to exercise and run my Mary Kay business.

Yay for open windows.

“Most of us are about as eager to be changed as we were to be born, and go through our changes in a similar state of shock.”-James Baldwin

Over it

So summer is really only fun for kids in non year round school and the teachers who teach them. I haven’t had a decent tan since 2008. And I live in Texas so that is a problem. Because compared to 90% of the people surrounding me I look a little cadaverous. Thank goodness for gradual tanning lotion!

I’m just over it. Summer used to be my favorite season. I love spending time in the sun, swimming, fishing, tubing, whatever. And if you live in Texas you better like summer because it basically runs from April to October.

But I have also always loved the fall and it has become my new favorite. Which is unfortunate because it really only lasts about 3 weeks here. But it is a glorious 3 weeks!

I really don’t know why but for some reason this year, I just have no desire to be outside in the sun. I guess a lot of it has to do with the fact that ever since becoming involved in Mary Kay I have seen the error of my old ways. I am now trying to protect my skin and keep it looking young.

But it’s more than that. I mean, I can protect my skin with sunscreen and an umbrella. I just miss the fall and I am in the mood for autumn-esque things like chili, peppermint mochas, snuggling under a blanket, not sweating all the time, football sundays, cozy sweats and most of all the return of my 7:45 min mile!!!

Fall please hurry!!