Well that’s new

I hate this week. I know my job revolves around students and I love helping them but the first week of school makes me want to drink exorbitant amounts of alcohol. Combine the unavoidable stress that the first week brings with a lot of organizational change and you get a giant zit on your face.

I am stressed and I am feeling it big time. But what’s different is my response. In the past, my first reaction is to solve any problem with this

and this

And yesterday was a really stressful day for me. I started the day off right with a 6 mile run but I took an unexpected trip to crazy town as soon as I walked in to my office. In the past, a day like that would have most assuredly ended with a trip to the pizza buffet. It has always been a struggle for me to not use food as comfort. I always tried to use food as a way to feel better (when we all know binge eating makes us feel worse).

BUT yesterday was different. I didn’t realize it immediately but sometime in the late afternoon I found myself craving a run. I just wanted to literally flee from my office. To take off into the forest somewhere (no we don’t actually have any near here) and just run. Just think, just be alone. I just craved time to sort things out in my mind without interruption. It didn’t matter that I had already spent an hour running that morning, I needed another one.

This is a wonderful thing!! A huge turn around for me!

The evening could have taken a nasty turn. Now that I am working on my appetite awareness, when I crave food I let myself feel the emotions. I think about them and try to rationalize with myself why I do not need the food. As opposed to feeling sad/stressed/mad/etc. and automatically shoving my face. The cravings are pretty strong though and this process usually turns me into a not-so-fun-to-be-around B. But instead of that, I had a lovely (somewhat healthy) dinner with Josh and then I tricked him into buying me a new pair of Under Armour compression pants!!

I am not all the way there yet, but this was a really huge step toward my goal of no longer using food to fulfill me.

“Your emotions affect every cell in your body. Mind and body, mental and physical, are intertwined.”-Thomas Tutko

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