Hurry up and wait

I learned a very valuable lesson last weekend. In case you don’t know this, I am not that patient of a person. In fact, I am quite impatient. I try very hard not to impose this on others but sometimes I just can’t help my little self.

Last Saturday was a gorgeous day here in St. Louis, Josh and I actually left the apartment! I needed a new pair of running shoes so we headed to the mall to check out the Dick’s Sporting Goods. And it seems that everyone else in area had the exact same idea because the parking lot was packed.


This is not the actual mall but a good illustration of the packed-ness of the lot.

So we got stuck in  bumper to bumper traffic around that circle road that goes all around the mall because all the spaces were taken. A few times we ventured out of the outside circle to see if we could find open spots but every time we saw someone pulling out, we just weren’t in a good position to get there and another car would beat us to it. So we resolved to leave the mall lot and find somewhere else to park and walk.

And then it happened…On our way out of the mall parking lot a car pulled out right next to us. We whipped in and got the spot. The timing was perfect!

We walked into the mall and found ourselves in the food court. We grabbed a couple free samples of sweet & sour chicken and headed to the first escalator we saw…which just happened to lead straight into Dick’s Sporting Goods.

And at that moment, I looked at Josh and said Ooooooohh.

The whole situation was a perfect metaphor for what’s going on in our lives. I want to know NOW! I want to know how much money Josh will make, what job I will get, when/if I will get pregnant, how much money we’ll be able to save etc.

And it’s mostly the “me getting a job” thing that’s been freaking me out. Ever since finding out that we’re going back to the town we came from, I have been feeling intense remorse about leaving my job. At the time, the plan was for me to go back to school when this was over so I wouldn’t need a full time job if we ended up back in that town. But as they so often do…the plan changed. I choose making money over losing it so I am not going back to school. Which makes me super worried about whether I made a mistake thus, I have been applying for jobs like crazy.

But what happened that day at the mall taught me that wonderful things happen when we aren’t trying so hard to force them. I am not saying I won’t be submitting applications (obviously I still have to try) but I can’t get so upset if a job doesn’t work out because then it just wasn’t meant to be.

Just like all the parking spaces we missed.

If we had gotten the first spots we saw, we would have missed out on free chicken AND had to walk a really long way to get to the store we needed. Which is not all that terrible, but the specifics are not what’s important here, you see, it’s the theme.

So even though Josh and I were really frustrated in the car whilst slowly inching our way around the parking lot trying to escape, we needed to wait for our spot. The one that was meant to lead us exactly where we needed to go.

And so it is with life…



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